I have always wanted to be a mom. When I married Wes, the desire to become a parent became even stronger. We waited a year and a half to "start trying" (spring break 2005). The possibility of being pregnant and starting a family together was so exciting.
Fast forward to January 2007. I took a pregnancy test the morning we were to go to a fertility doctor. It was positive. I canceled the appointment and was in complete shock. 2 days later, I took another pregnancy test. It was negative. Next day - blood test. Negative. I had what they call a chemical pregnancy. Whatever it's called, it's no fun.
November 2007 - May 2008 - 2 rounds of IUI. Nothing happened, but me being an emotional mess.
Wes and I felt God asking us to wait and do nothing. This was hard.
Fall 2008 - I started thinking about adoption. Wes wasn't thinking about adoption. I remember telling my mom when I was younger that I would like to adopt some day. I wanted to respect Wes. The last thing I wanted to do was pressure him into such a life changing decision. I began to pray that one of our hearts would be changed.
January 2009 - Our dear friends, Matt and Abby, (who, by the way, are responsible for the name of this blog) adopted a baby girl. Wes and I were able to see a real life adoption story and the blessings that come out of it.
August 2009 - Wes said, "Abby, let's adopt." Abby said, "Ok." Wes' heart changed.
October 2009 - Wes and I attended an informational meeting at Adoption Support Center in Indy. Matt and Abby's neighbors adopted two boys through this agency. Looking back, I can't even tell you our reasoning behind choosing this agency. We just went with it and trusted God that He would close the door if this wasn't where He wanted us. We loved the agency and decided to start the process.
January 2010 - A birthmom wanted to meet us. We found out that she was from the Gary area, but was in a rehab center in Fort Wayne. She would be having her baby in Fort Wayne. This for sure was the baby God had for us! We met her and the meeting went really well. She had it narrowed down to us and another couple. We were her #1 pick. The counselor said, "Birthmoms almost always go with their first choice. It's just to make sure that they made the right decision." She didn't pick us. That was a humbling experience and we would love to know the reason she went with the other couple, but we know that God had other plans.
February 2010 - Another birthmom had chosen us and wanted to meet us. She was having a boy that was due in April.
A few days after we were matched with birthmom #2, we got a call from the agency saying that there was a baby girl waiting for us at a hospital in Indy. I was so confused. After freaking out, praying and talking to Wes and my parents, I remember saying to the agency, "As hard as it is to turn this baby girl down, we really feel like we are supposed to stick with birthmom #2. We know it's not a guarantee, but we also know that God is in control."
We met birthmom #2, the dad and her 2 kids. Everything went very smoothly. We were so excited and couldn't believe this was really going to happen!
Sidenote: The couple that adopted the baby girl are friends with our friend, Matt's (mentioned earlier) sister. God is amazing!
March 2010 - Found out the 2nd birthmom was a scam. Once again confused, but trusting Him. At the end of the month, we were matched with birthmom #3 who was due July 3rd.
April 2010 - We met birthmom #3. We loved her and later found out that she loved us! Over the next few months we met with her another time, went to a few doctor's appointments and had quite a few phone conversations.
June 27, 2010 - Our birthmom was scheduled to be induced at 5 pm. During church that morning, we got a call from her mom saying that she was in labor. We got to South Bend around 1:00. At 5:50, both Wes and I were able to see our son, John Maxwell, come into this world. His sweet birthmom wanted a chance to hold him first. Although this made me a little nervous, I wanted her to be able to do whatever she needed to do to help her cope with this heroic decision she was making. Then I heard her say the words that I had been waiting for. "Max, would you like to meet your mommy?" With a smile on her face and tears in her eyes, this amazing woman gave me the greatest gift anyone on this earth could give.
We love Max's birthmom. We love our story. We love Max.