Adoption {It's Not Second Best}

"Just wait.  As soon as you adopt, you will probably get pregnant!"

Oh, if I had a dollar for every time I heard this statement. {It could possibly fund our next adoption.}

I know  think people say this to be encouraging, but it's not really.  It feels like you're saying,  "Hopefully, this adoption situation will tied you over until you get the real thing."

We didn't settle when we adopted.  More importantly, it's been God's plan for our lives all along and God for sure doesn't settle.  As we focused on His plan, we were very excited about adopting.  There were many times that I told Wes, "I would be a little disappointed if I got pregnant right now."
Wes would very lovingly and figuratively slap me in the face and remind me of this:

If God wanted me to get pregnant, that's what would happen and we would be elated and if God wanted us to adopt, that's what would happen and we would be elated.

Thanks, Wes.

Did I think that our first and possibly all of our children would come to us through adoption?  No.

Would I have it any other way?  Absolutely not.  We were blessed with this kid.




  1. I can totally relate with a similar comment that we get ALL the time. Luke is our biological child and when people hear that we will be adopting our second, many say, "But don't you want to have any more kids of your own?" Ahhhhhhhh. Drives me bonkers. We have to patiently explain (sometimes more than once, to the same person!) that our adopted kids WILL be our own. Super frustrating - especially because, like you, adoption has always been "plan a" for us.

  2. We got that a lot even though we purposely set out to adopt when out bio-daughter was only 6 months old. It's ON PURPOSE. It's not a second choice. In fact, when my husband and I were dating, I told him there would be no going further unless he agreed to adopt regardless of bio children. He agreed. Adoption was my FIRST choice. Trying to get pregnant in the first place just seemed like a way to avoid all the paperwork in my mind. LOL.

  3. I came to your blog because I saw in my stats that someone had come to me from you (thanks for the sidebar mention!). But I will stay for the 31 days of adoption. I have an older sister & a younger, {adopted} brother. My parents adopted not out of fertility issues but because they wanted another child & didn't want a baby. Because of that (he was 7 when he came, I was 15) I have two biological children and when I married my husband I told him that we would have whatever children we wanted (how many) but that at least one would be adopted. My heart longs to adopt lots of children. Not that I didn't love being pregnant and creating life out of the love my husband and I share but now I look forward to creating a LOVING life (by adoption) out of the love my husband and I share. If that makes sense?
    I agree- Adoption is not second best :)
    @ Creative Kristi

  4. Great post! Adoption is God's plan our family and we wouldn't have it any other way. We surprisingly got pregnant after adopting and get the "since you adopted you got pregnant" line all the time. I'm just glad that my oldest doesn't understand it yet. It would kill me if he thought we adopted just so we could get pregnant. That statement totally minimizes his existence in our family. I just wish I knew how to respond. Anyway, off on a tangent. Thank you for a beautifully written post!

  5. Oh yes! The endless comments of "as soon as you 'get your baby' you will be pregnant". While this may be true..let's stop and take a minute to celebrate, appreciate and REJOICE over my first child, because they are "MY child". I know there is a lot of good intentions and love behind those silly comments...but..ya know!



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